


Can It be me?

by melancholic_morfran



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:15:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27188506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melancholic_morfran/pseuds/melancholic_morfran
Summary: Tsukishima Kei died years ago and Kuroo is devastated. The Nekoma Ex-Captain cannot accept his lover's death and drowned himself in his own vices. Then enter Kenma who he accidentally had a one night stand which he called a mistake.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Kudos: 14





	Can It be me?

**Author's Note:**

> Haikyu is owned by Haruichi Furudate. This is also but a mere one shot. Feedbacks are appreciated. This also inspired by Moira's song, Paubaya or in English Let Go, Give Up or Give in.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  
❛ and you would never know how  
painful it is to fight someone who  
is already gone. ❜

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ  
As the four walls became the witness of such passionate fornication of two lovers; one whose mind and soul is drowning in the sea of his own vice, liquor whilst the flaxen lad is drunk in his silent whispers of ardent love.

The crumpling of sheets continued as the moans of pleasure engulfs the whole space —ecstatic sounds and cries became the only music inside drowning the love song on the radio with their murmurs of hot love.

"I love you, Kuroo." Kenma stated as her breathing hitched, white fluid made its way to his thighs then the older man collapsed to his side, hugging him tight. "Kei, I love you." snores then followed his confession of love—shattering the lad's heart.

As his eyes started to moist, Kenma snuggled to the man beside him who embraced him tight muttering the name of his deceased lover once more, Kei.

Can it be me, please?

As the beams of light reached the sleeping figures of Kuroo, his forehead creased in annoyance as the crapulence of the alcohol that he drank last night finally kicked in. Trying to get up, his gaze shifted to the lad that is currently sleeping comfortably beside him, bare. 

Looking at his surroundings, he is indeed not in his room nor in Kei's apartment but in Kenma's. Staring at the clothes that are currently scattered on the floor, he inferred what actually happened. More or less. 

"Kuroo...?" Kenma's sleepy voice startled him. The events that happened last night, it's nothing but a m̶i̶s̶t̶a̶k̶e̶.

"Forget it. Everything that happened. It was wrong. Morally and all—Kei, he will be disgusted." he said frantically whilst scurrying to pick his clothes—not even careful with his choice of words. 

"Kei is dead. Tsukishima is dead years ago, Kuroo. So why is this wrong?" Kenma asked—voice breaking. 

"He may be dead to others but for me he's, Kei's presence, I can still feel it! He's alive! He's with me! He's—!" Kuroo's vociferation is cut off by Kenma. 

"He's dead, Kuroo. Kei's gone. You should accept that and look around you! We're still here for you! I'm... I'm here for you." he said weakly. Ever since Tsukishima died, Kuroo shut everyone down, even him. The first years of his death was really hard for a of them especially to Kuroo. But a dead person is already gone. They will never, ever come back. But he, Kuroo alone cannot accept that. 

"No one can replace Kei. Not even you, Kenma." he then scoffed at him and shut the door of the room behind him. Leaving Kenma alone whose tears started to cascade from his pale cheeks. 

The lad continuesly tried to wipe his tears but to no avail. The liquid that is produced by his own despondency won't stop no matter how hard he wipe. 

Competing against someone who is  
already dead—is so frustrating.  
Because no matter how hard I try, it  
will never be enough. I will never be  
enough. 

𝗧𝗜𝗠𝗘𝗦𝗞𝗜𝗣

Signing one document after the other, Kenma halted when his mobile device rang, indicating that someone is calling. The screen then displayed Yaku's name which made him answer the call. Afterall, ignoring his calls may result to bad consequences. 

"Kenma! It's been awhile!" his energetic yet caring voice never cease to warm his heart. 

"Yaku-san, what's up?" he asked in his usual monotonous tone. Lev and the others seems to be with him as well since he can hear their noise and giggles from the speaker. 

"We'll be having a gathering! The whole Nekoma and Fukorodani. The guys from Karasuno will be here as well!" 

Those guys, huh. Its been awhile since he last saw them. Going there won't be a bad idea at all but his work is piling up and he can't just ditch it and party with them. 

"I don't think that I can come, Yaku-san. I'm busy as it is. But I'll try to make time." he said unsure. 

"He will also be here, Kenma." Yaku said silently. Kenma then fell silent. And he just gave him a reason to not come. "Yaku-san, I'm sorry but just give my regards to everyone. I.. I don't think I'll be able to attend afterall. You know why, right?" his gripped on his phone became tight. He can barely control his trembling. It seems like his heart is yet to heal. 

"But Kenma, he's a changed man now. Kuroo looked as if he's already over it. You should give yourself and him a chance. There's still time." the former libero sure sounded desperate. But giving himself a second chance only means that he's opening his heart once again to another wave of pain. 

"Yaku-san. There would be no 'us' there never were. All happened to the both of us is just nothing but one sided love. I was the one with him... you know what happened that night. I don't want to experience that again. I'm the one beside him that night and yet he's looking for someone else. Someone, dead."he then ended the call and lean on his chair. Prolonging the call won't do him any good. He's healing now. He will face him when he's already fine. If that time comes. 

Their paths must never cross again or  
else, he would lose it.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a trial summary for my wattpad fanfic, Wish I Was Heather.
> 
> penelope_nava is my name if you're curious.


End file.
